Sunday, May 20, 2012

Billy Joe Bucktooth

Thanks to the horrible advice I got from BabiesRUs technical support, I stupidly cleared all my browser history yesterday.  As a result, all my typically automatic log-ons were deleted, and I had to recall all of my passwords.  I figured out most of them, but for the life of me could not get back into my Swagbucks account.  I finally threw up the white flag by sending them this message:

From: Kelli Philpot
Sent: 5/18/2012
To: Swag Bucks Support
Subject: I can't log in.

I forgot my password, so clicked "forgot your password", got an email, opened the link, then got an error message saying to contact you. 

Also, I typically log in using facebook, but for some reason it won''t let me.

All I really need is a password.  Thanks!

This is what they replied:

From: Swagbucks Support <support@swagbucks.com>
Subject: Swagbucks.com-I can''t log in. [ ref:_00D80dLPC._50080JFdld:ref ]
To: "philpotcnst@yahoo.com" <philpotcnst@yahoo.com>
Date: Friday, May 18, 2012, 4:51 PM

Hello Kelli Philpot,

My name is Jon and I will be more than happy to help you with your account info.

For security reasons, we do require you to provide the answer to your security question. Below I have provided the question you chose at signup.

Who was your first kiss?

Once your security answer has been confirmed I will be able to send you your password.

Regards,
Jon 

This is where it gets a little embarrassing. 

Wow, we're getting a little personal here, aren't we?  Not to sound like a loose woman or anything, but I'm not sure how I would have answered that.  Either Billy Joe Bucktooth* or Patrick Philpot.  Whatever happened to "mother's maiden name"?

Thanks,
Kelli Philpot  


Here's the thing: technically, my first kiss was with Billy Joe*, but my real first kiss was with Patrick.  What's the difference?  I'm glad you asked.  See, at the end of my eighth grade year, I went with a bunch of the other science geeks from my school on a field trip to Disney World.  (This was the year before 9/11, before public schools got gun-shy about students on planes.)  Like any eighth grader whose idea of romance was formed by watching Family Matters, I believed that Disney World was THE place to fall in love.  I figured it was now or never! 

That's why, when Billy Joe* asked "Will you be my girlfriend", and then the next day, "Do you want to kiss," the answers were "yes" and "yes".  How romantic, right?  Wrong.  Because I figured the surest way to end life as I knew it would be to get caught kissing a boy, I insisted that the deed take place on a train ride that went through a dark tunnel.  We rode that ride three times before we finally got it "right".  The first try, we missed altogether.  The second try, our noses bonked, and by the time we were ready to try again, we were back in the daylight.  The third try, we had lip to lip contact!  Talk about disappointing.  After that, he actually asked me if he could put his tongue in my mouth.  Or maybe if we could tongue kiss.  I don't recall the exact verbiage,  but it did include the word "tongue".  I politely  declined.  In the airport the next day, without ever actually breaking up with him, I said, "Don't tell anyone we went out." 

Not one of my proudest moments.  So thank you, Jon with Swagbucks, for the walk down memory lane. 

What's the most embarrassing thing you've ever told a complete stranger?
-Kelli

*Name changed to protect the opportunist innocent

Monday, May 14, 2012

What's On My Mind Monday

Linking up over here:
miscellany monday at
lowercase letters
I.  You've got to love out of the blue, just because, gifts.  My mom showed up at our house last Wednesday night, arms filled with all of this:
This isn't the first time she's randomly shown up with groceries, but it's definitely the biggest bounty to date!  And, yes, our pantry and freezer were already full, but not with anything nearly as fun as pop tarts, burgers, steaks, pork chops, or bacon!  Ohhhhh, and the cinnamon rolls.  Mmmmm.  Now, that was a good start to my first (second?  does pregnancy count?) mother's day.  If you look closely at the top left portion of the table, you'll see she got Madison some treats, too!  I've got to say, though, that Gerber was being more than a little sneaky by calling their product "biscuits".  One of the main ingredients is sugar!  She gets one (maybe) a day.

Needless to say, we haven't eaten rice and beans since Wednesday.

II.  Mother's Day was so much fun!  First, Pat surprised me with a frappuccino and card that he and Madison made together:
 Madison and I played hooky from church (not intentionally, just a timing mishap), then headed out with Patrick to hit the stores/mall playground/TGI Fridays.  The stores were kind of a bust; I did exchange a less-than-month-old pair of jeans from Old Navy that busted a seam on the back pocket(which, by the way, they did without a receipt, no questions asked-kudos!), but then I spent forty five minutes trying to find just one top that I liked at Plato's Closet.  I guess I just wasn't in the spending mood, because we walked out empty handed. 

Madison was, as usual, the smallest kid on the playground, and I'm pretty sure Patrick had at least three near-miss heart attacks when bigger kids zoomed past her. 

By the time we got to Fridays, she was about three hours late for her daily nap, yet still managed to be on her best behavior.  Sweet girl!  Oh, and she was wearing a cute navy headband with a bow, but it had magically become a necklace about seventeen times by this point, so here she is in all her "what a handsome little boy you have" glory.  As if the frilly shirt with pink and purple, the sparkly shoes, and the pink sippy cup weren't clue enough.  But I digress.
She had sweet potato fries (Patrick was surprised that they were fried, haha) and LOVED them.
We ate something a little less healthy:
Okay, we did eat "real" food, too, but you know this ^ was the main event.

III.  I'm doing "Insanity" with a group of ladies from my church.  It started on Monday, but I didn't jump in until Wednesday.  I've only done three workouts, one of which was a recovery, but my calves are still so sore that I have to stop and recover for a minute any time I stand up.  I'm pretty excited about it, because I actually believe that the results they promise (just google "insanity results" or "insanity before and afters") are real.  For a workout this hard, of course you're going to get crazy-good results!

Happy Monday!
-Kelli

Monday, May 7, 2012

What's On My Mind Monday

Linking up over here:
miscellany monday at
lowercase letters

I.  This parenting thing is getting to be a lot more fun.  Baby belly laughs are pretty easy to come by these days!  A few guaranteed strategies for a squealing Madi:
  • Tickling: (In order of effectiveness) the best "tools" for tickling are mouth, feet (eww), toys, then hands.  The best targets are ribs (front), ribs (back), under her jaw, chunky monkeys (aka thighs), and feet.
  • Advanced Peek-a-Boo:  This is more of a Hide-and-Seek/Peek-a-Boo hybrid.  Basically, I run away from her, hide, and call out "Where's Mommy" repeatedly.  She follows, then when she gets close, I jump out and yell, "PEEK-a-boo!"  Works every time.
  • Offering to take her and Bella outside.   However, we can't use that word without really meaning it.  Some other words we have to spell: milk, cup, hoopla (kids' videos on youtube).
  • Playing with Bella.  Her absolute favorite pastime is being whacked in the face by Bella's tail.  Her second favorite is probably being knocked over by Bella.  (I'm not being sarcastic; she really enjoys when Bella knocks her over.  It's the only time she doesn't cry after falling!)  She also loves to "pet" Bella, which involves any combination of hitting, fur pulling, and ear tugging.  
II.  Yesterday was a bit scary for us.  Patrick got a call during church from his cousin, saying that Pat's diabetic dad had passed out and was unresponsive.  He was admitted to the hospital (about two hours from our home), and we didn't get word that he was okay until Pat and his brother were halfway there.  He's fine, already back home and pretty much recovered, but afterwards Patrick and I admitted to each other that we had been really worried.  I'm so thankful he's okay!

III.  We sold our coffee table toddler death trap yesterday.  I almost feel like we should have paid the buyer for helping to make our house safer, but who am I to argue with a crisp twenty?  Our living room feels much bigger without it, but not in a good way.  It seems cold and empty.  I wonder how close twenty bucks could get me to an ottoman with storage.  I'll have to scour Pinterest and see what I can come up with!

I think that's all for now.  Happy Monday!
-Kelli